Fear my Bendy Straw
by fucking faggot
Summary: I decided to do a Johnny Fic, fear me, Oohg. Nny gets sugar high. Chapter two is now up!
1. Default Chapter

Fear my Bendy Straw  
  
Discalimer- Er! MMMM!! AHHHH!!! Anyways, JTHM and all the stuff of greatness in this fic belongs to  
the all knowing, all mighty, JHONEN VASQUEZ!! *dun dun dunnnnn!!!* I now cough on you.  
  
Author notes- ERGH! SUGAR HIGH AGAIN!! FEAR ME!! Woo! Ima monkey, check-a dis! OOH OOH YEAH!!  
Anyways, Johnny gets sugar high, just like Gaz did in "Sugar High". If you haven't read that,  
read it before this, cause I command you to.  
  
*~*~*~*  
  
Fear my Bendy Straw  
  
Nny stared down at the twelve or so empty brain freezie cups on the floor that he drank a few  
hours ago. He should kill the 24/7 store clerk more often, being as he could get free cherry  
doom brain freezies. Mmm mm, yum. He reached into his pocket pulling out a package of blueberry  
pop-rocks, which was the reason he killed the clerk. There was no cherry pop-rocks in stock and  
the clerk dude was too lazy to fill it up for him.  
  
He really didn't like to resort to stealing, but he did leave a five dollar bill on the counter,  
just because he was in a good mood.  
  
Nny looked up at the crazy looking Burger Boy statue which had misterously appeared after coming  
back from Hell, or whatever he had been to. He could have went to the town dumb for all he cared.  
The devil was an ass, God was a chubby, furby look alike, and he really missed his head-explody  
powers and that cool coat.  
  
(Fiz:My mom has just informed me that I am retarded, ain't that great?)  
  
Anyways, Johnny C. ripped open the package of pop-rocks and dumped some into his mouth, a little  
too much. The shock of the mixture of cherry doom and blueberry pop rocks somehow created a bit  
of shock to Nny's brain (ever been electricuted by pop-rocks? Not a pleasent experience.).  
  
"Cheddar cheese, mozzarella, smear if on my dick 'cause I'm a naughty fella!"  
  
Johnny immediatly slammed his hands over his mouth. What the fuck did he just say!? That  
had to be the most disgusting, weird saying he had ever come up with, yet, he found himself  
giggling.  
  
"What the hell is wrong with YOU!?" asked Reverend MEAT.  
  
"Come on, burger boy, we're going for a ride! SQUEEEEEEE!!!!" Nny said, grabbing the statue and  
running out the door.  
  
Nny opened his car door and slid MEAT into the passanger's seat, and buckled him up.  
  
"Buckle up for safety, buckle up! For all you know, we might hit a giant duck! Quack quack!" Nny  
sang to himself, buckling himself in, shoving the key into the ignition and starting the car up.  
  
"Vroom! VROOOOOM!!"  
  
"Where exactly are we going Nny?"  
  
Johnny was some what baffled at this question. He opened his mouth to speak, but closed it. He  
decided it was okay to talk to yourself, but you should worry if you start answering yourself.  
Anyways, he decided where he was going already.  
  
The nearest one was about 12 miles away, so he decided to go to the 24/7 store again, and load  
his pocket with various candys, grab yet another cherry doom freezie, and sense Reverened MEAT asked  
him, he stole the dead clerk's vest.  
  
"You know Nny, you shouldn't be eating that much candy during a sugar high..."  
  
"WHAT DO YOU KNOW, MEAT HEAD!!??" Nny managed to say after shoveing his eighteenth Starburst fruit  
chew in his mouth, then took a drink from his freezie.  
  
"Much, I know much. Anyway, its good that your getting out. I like this vest." MEAT said to himself,  
because Nny was too busy paying attention to the road. More like trying to run over all the pedestrians  
in sight.  
  
*WHUMP* Sixth ped hit.  
  
They finally arrived at the giant toy store horror know as Toys R Us. "WE'RE HERE!" annonuced Nny,  
sounding like he had won the gold metal in running some race.  
  
"Toys R US? WHY TOYS R US!?" asked the skeptical MEAT.  
  
"New Dragonball Z toys this month! WEEHOO!!" Nny yelled as he jumped out of the car window, but  
forgetting to unbuckle himself.  
  
The Bub's Burger Boy statue snicker at himself, watching Nny almost choke trying to get out of the  
seat belts evil grasp, which he soon got out of.  
  
"Thank the Weasil God that I'm skinny!" Nny said to himself poking his belly, just because he could.  
He then unstrapped the Burger Boy and walked toward the entrance.  
  
"Your going to bring me in with you!?" asked Reverened MEAT, yet the question was never answered.  
  
"PINEAPPLE NOISE!!!" screamed Johnny as he entered the toy store, and frigtened all the kids there,  
because Pineapple Noises are scary, ooooh...  
  
Nny ran to the nearest display, which was the stuffed toys. He searched threw all of them until he  
found the perfect one. A Zebra! He soon put his Zebra toy on his head, put all the plushies back  
in the bucket, including a few little kids mistaken as stuffed toys.  
  
Johnny soon found the Leggo isle, which was full of Leggo type fun, wee! He grabbed various boxes  
from the shelf, dumped all the tiny parts onto the floor, and began to build.  
  
"Whew! I are finished!! Err!!! CHEESE NUGATS!!" Nny said triumphetely at his masterpiece of building  
blocks. It was Happy Noodle Boy in all his glory, in one of his yelling posses, there was many  
because he yelled at people alot.  
  
"Momma, whats wrong with that man?" asked a boy, pointing at Nny, who was now feasting on left over  
Leggo pieces he had not used.  
  
"I don't know son..." the boy's mom said, tilting her head, confused at the thin man's actions.  
  
Nny turned around and faced the mother and child. "YOU STARE, AND DISCUSS OF ME!! YET YOU ENVY MY HAT!!"  
he screamed in the woman's face, then turned and ran toward the exit, but not without pushing the  
Giant Noodle Boy sculpture onto the boy.  
  
The sugar high Nny jumped into his car and drove off to his house, still with the Zebra plushie  
on his head. He was upset that the woman did not envy his hat, which was the most beautiful  
Zebra plushie hat in the world, in his opinon.  
  
He soon arrived at house 777, his home, the house where hundreds have lost they're lives, yet it  
was not filled with cheese as Nny wanted at the moment.  
  
Nny went up to the front door, to only realize;  
  
"OH MY GOSH, I LEFT BURGER BOY THERE!! I MUST SAVE HIM!!" Nny announced, as he once again jumped  
into his car, and drove toward the 24/7 store to get more candy and another freezie for the long  
trip ahead of him.  
  
THE END!! (Fiz: YAY!)  
  
*~*~*~*  
Okay, I liked that alot. I know I had Nny WAY out of character, and I probably had Reverend MEAT  
out of character. Yet I enjoyed writing this. Now, I wanted to include Devi in here, but I didn't  
get to it. If I get good reviews on this, I might make a second chapter that includes Devi,  
continueing Johnny's adventure in his sugar high state.  
  
  
  



	2. Chapter 2

Fear my Bendy Straw  
Chapter 2  
  
Disclaimer-Baaah....  
  
Author Notes- You asked for it, and my god did you ask for it, and now you get what you asked for,  
ARRGH!! Tis' Chapter two of Fear my Bendy Straw! AUGH, CAT POKED ME!!  
  
*~*~*~*  
  
Fear my Bendy Straw  
Chapter 2  
  
Johnny had been leaving the 24/7 store, and while doing this, he had crashed a total of  
twenty seven cars, because he had been driving down the middle of the street! WEE!!  
  
He also found a new voice in his head, da green leaf. The leaf was a wise old fellow, with two  
teeth and three hairs, and was now giving Nny advice about ....uh....stuff?  
  
"AUGH, DAMNIT, LISTEN!! ARGH, I AM YELLING AT YOU, LISTEN, FUCK!" Nny had been trying to get the  
leaf'ss attention for a few minutes now, and also he was more sugar high then ever. He could feel  
a big glomp of sugar run through his veins, like giant radioactive rubber pants! (Yeehee, IZ quote)  
  
"What is it, Johnny?" asked green leaf.  
  
"Gimme that!" Nny exclaimed, pointing to a tootsie roll next to the leaf in the passanger's seat.  
  
"...." replied the leaf, and flew out the car-door window.   
  
"OH MY GOD!! I'M COMING!!" Johnny screamed, swerving the car around to catch the escaping leaf, while  
causing another four car accidents.  
  
Nny watched the leaf fly up towards an apartment building, and fly into one of the open windows. He parked  
the car in the middle of the road, and jumped out the window again, but this time he hadn't gagged himself.  
He also caused another twelve car crashes!   
  
*Meanwhile in Devi's apartment...thingy*  
  
Tenna had been squeeking Spooky now for twenty minutes, having a conversation with the beast that squeeks.  
This had extremely annoyed Devi, who was trying to paint a rat ripping a door-to-dorr salesman's head off,  
and this was the third time she had start over.  
  
"AUGH WOULD YOU STOP SQUEAKING THAT THING!!??"  
  
"What thing? Spooky is not a "thing"! Spooky is... well Spooky! Isn't that right?" Tenna had Spooky give a  
'Yes' squeek, which was a high pitched squeek.  
  
"Uuugh......"  
  
"C'mon, kill her..."  
  
"Hush, Sickness!"  
  
*BING BONG BING BING BING BING BING BING BZZZAAAACK!!!!*  
  
"WHAT!?" screamed Devi as she opened the door, to find the sugar high homicidal maniac with a plush  
Zebra on his head.  
  
"GIMME MY LEAF, NEED MY TEA, ERGH ERGH, WOOT!" Nny exclaimed as he tackled Devi and started squeezing  
the life out of her.  
  
"MMPH, AGH GET OFFA ME!!! GLAAA!!"  
  
"Ooh nice Zebra!!" Tenna complimented as she picked up the Zebra toy, which had fallen onto the floor, and  
had Spooky ride it.  
  
"GET OUTTA MY WAY OR I'LL PISS ON YOUR HEAD, MY PEE IS ACID SO YOU'LL BE REALLY DEAD!" Johnny cried out as  
he jumped from Devi's head onto Tenna.  
  
"AGH!! Mmmm....Cherry Doom!"  
  
"Nny, Nny you little fuck! Get out of here before I call the damn cops!" Devi said, as she reached for a  
bottle of mace.  
  
Nny looked up at Devi with big sad eyes, grabbed his Zebra, and started to beat Tenna with it.  
  
"Oh god, DEVI!! Help!! AGH!!! *thwack* OW!" Tenna squeeled.  
  
Devi found herself giggling, because Tenna getting up with a stuffed toy was kinda amusing, scratch  
that, EXTREMELY amusing.  
  
"Ooh..whus dis?" Nny asked, picking up the fallen Spooky.  
  
"Th...thats Spooky!" Tenna replied, squirming away.  
  
"SPOOKY CUTE, NNY MARRY SPOOKY, NNY HAPPY, NNY LIKES TALKIN' IN THIRD PERSON!" Johnny said proudly, placing  
Spooky in his mouth and crawled up Devi as if she where a mountain, and sitting on her shoulders, and  
commensed to squeeking Spooky.  
  
"Errgh!! Get offa mee!!" Devi whined.  
  
"Aww... Kodak Moment!" Tenna squee'd as she grabbed a camera and took a picture of the two.  
  
"Tenna, damnit, get him off my head before he tries to kill me again!" Devi was only to be drowned out  
by Johnny's snoring. He had fallin asleep.  
  
"He looks harmless enough, I like his hair cut!" said Tenna, helping Nny off of Devi's shoulders.  
  
Devi started fixing her hair, "What do we do with him?"  
  
Tenna looked at the sleeping Nny on the floor, thinking 'Aww, cute!'. "I dunno, maybe we could adopt  
him as a pet!" Tenna replied, rubbing Johnny's belly like a dog. (Augh, Bad Mental Image! FLAAA!!)  
  
"Cut that out, Tenna! Look, lets just get him to his house, and run like hell!"  
  
"Aww, okay, but I wanted to make him run in one of those hamster wheel thingys!" Tenna said sadly.  
  
And that exactly what they did! They threw him into his house by throwing him through a window, like a rag  
doll, and ran like hell! WOOO!!  
  
*LATER*  
  
"Ugh....shit, I fell asleep....my head..." Nny had finally woke up.  
  
He then grabbed his Die-ary, cursing to himself for sleeping, and started writing in it.  
  
"Dear Die-ary  
I can't remember what I did today, but my head hurts like I wacked it on a bowling ball full of nails.  
All I can remeber is that I know have a skeleton doll for a bride, and that I had ate alot of candy, because  
my shirt is all sticky from Starbursts. Excuse me, I have to throw up."  
  
(Okay, I'm not gonna write about him throwing up a mixture of candy and bran-freezy, I'm gonna let you  
visualize this, because I will probably gag up my last three meals trying to describe it, kae?)  
  
Just then, the Burger Boy statue ran into homicidal maniac's house, with a piece missing from his head, and  
covered in dirty finger prints.  
  
"What happened to you?" asked a queezy Johnny.  
  
"Lets just say I was attacked by rabid toddlers, and not go into all the other stuff that happened." replied  
Reverend MEAT.  
  
"Okay, I'm gonna write a Happy Noodle Boy comic, I just got this great idea! Cheddar Cheese, Mozzerrela..."  
Nny said, walking off. Do I really need to finish that quote for you?  
  
THE END (If you can read this, your brain hasn't been fried up yet with my insane ramblings)  
  
*~*~*~*  
Thats it! I am now officaly brain dead, and I have an evil song stuck in my head. FOOK! Anyways,  
I have to thank my dad for the "Cheddar Cheese" quote, you for reading this pile of squak, and those  
who reviewed the last chapter. I am off to see if all my fingers are attached, seeya!  
  



End file.
